S00Ner or later

i know who is that person already.
i suddenly got this feeling that i don't know you well enough.
is this how its gonna be.
how can you just ignore.
so much effort.
and so this is just it?

forget it.

lengshan; sad and disappointed

it will be different

this shocking news which at that instant I was looking back..somehow its just so unpredictable, unexpected, I shouldn't have hidden those things, now I am guilty, sorry for it. but yet you still allowed it to be that way, not asking, respecting me. I am glad now that at least we didn't miss anything but this. many words just too hard to say. all the highness and the listening and talking I will miss it. bus, mrt rides, sitting on the holed chairs, just listening and talking.. you've changed I feel, for the better. from secular to biblical, never once didn't we failed to do so..I guess it will just be different without you. no one will come "save and drag" us away. I guess I've paid my price because you've hidden this. so we are quits. but after that period of time, we would no longer be quits okay? that eraser will be my favourite one, will always be in my pencil box. going to the oceans at night, on those both sats, I must admit that you never failed to realise that I'm always in deep thoughts.. hopefully we have been nice, and that you felt happy being with us, be it helping us solve issues or just "eating chilli", we were glad. we must climb the 104 steps again okay? hopefully the stars will be out. anyway, if you asked me about who is in that jackpot again, I will tell you. this period, it will be different, yes, I can definitely tell you it will be different. this post is dedicated to you..

I will miss you, co-creator of the _ _ _ _ _ _ (you're the fourth one).

lengshan; :(

God answers prayers!

GOSH THANK GOD!!!!!!! praise Him praise Him!
yesterday night was just so awesome! God answers prayers.. He answered!
about one week ago, I kept asking friends around me if they have extra hillsongs tickets, but of course to no avail..I was like complaining to God how badly I wanted to go cause last year's concert was great..I was really really sad.. and my friend still told me say that its impossible to get a ticket now cause he also had friends asking around but no one has extra and that his ticket itself was bought one month ago! wow.. that really dampen my mood.. so I thought maybe this year I had missed my chance so forget it.. then last night, I just happen to very thick-skinned ask carmen to add me into tracy and her conversation.. since they are discussing about worship and I happen to be online. haha while discussing and talking though of course I didn't say anything throughout the whole conversation, then carmen suddenly asked, "hey I've got 8 tickets for hillsongs concert, anyone interested?"

WAH IMM I called her and asked her if she can afford to give me 4 tickets and she said can!!!!! I was so happy, until I was really speechless. God is amazing, so amazing..okay thats the first thing..next was the preparation for denise's birthday. cause we intend to surprise her on her birthday itself but somehow its a tuesday so it might not be appropriate. carmen and I were brain-storming and then she suggested going to minds cafe so I thought like probably most of the girls wouldn't want cause its weekday, it will end late and its quite ex too..BUT tues just happen to be ladies night!!! and its free of charge!! so seems like everything is going really well! okay so the next worry is about the time.. so ah phui and I splitted to call up the girls and guess what, it happens so many of them can make it!!! everything went so well! God is really amazing, so amazing..

third thing! I was really worried for ya these few days, cause she is really sick, and how I wish I could go visit her to surprise her but I end school late everyday. but now I dont need go see her already cause she's healed already!! last night I told her about the hillsongs concert thing and since she's sick so she might have to miss the chance, though its a rare chance. hmmm but we'll have to be socially resposible and also her health.. so I told her say that if she doesn't recover by tomorrow then she really cannot go lor..I guess we both prayed really hard, and this morning she intended to go hospital if she doesn't recover from her fever, but... she doesn't need to now!!! God is so amazing, so so amazing.. thank God for everything and for hearing and answering prayers..

lengshan; thankful ><

:)

just a simple message,
where are you
and a call.
just a simple thank you.
it meant so much.
thanks you ya, ah gong and ja. :)

worthy.

don't care whether they understand or not, just share, for you never know what you are going to reap..
God You are yesterday today the same, forever. You are who is, who was and who is to come.
only You fit the criteria of forever.
everyone follows something or someone, is that something or someone worthy? if it is then you will be as special, but if its not, then you are as worthless.

who or what are you following today..

compassion for the world

every cell is always new. today's cell is as good as the last, or probably I can see that they start to bond really closely. something really touched me today and this actually kept me going, no matter how tough handling cell gets. I was asking for prayer requests and instead of the norm like studies, health, friends, or family, one of my girls denise, she asked me,
"can I pray for the families of those who suffered the jakatar's bombings?"

oh man, how sweet.. I mean like people usually pray for the people whom they know, or at least have a direct relationship with them. but this is different, we do not know the jakatar people, and we are not even related to them in any way and yet, I see this heart of compassion for strangers, people she don't know. She has the heart of compassion for the world. this really makes me ponder about the things that are happening in this world right now. I feel like I am living under bedrock that I didn't know what is going on with the world right now. somehow, whatever happens to you will not affect the world but the contrary is untrue, whatever happens to the world will affect you. pray for the world, for the world to be saved, for the world to bow to God's plans. pray for God's mercy..

lengshan; God's merciful eyes

back to basics

You saw me before I was born.
You created me for a purpose.
You knew me before I was born.

It came from the first day of the 40-day prayer book that I was reading last night. though it was late, but God had still reveal a little bit more about Him to me. He told Jeremiah that he was chosen, even before he was born, to serve the Lord and be a light for God's people. Many of us may feel that we aren't that important to God because we do not have a major breakthrough that effectively changes our lives 180 degrees. We also often want God to perform miracles in our lives and answers our questions by showing us signs. But we failed to see that actually our salvation, our first call to God, "Father" has already been a miracle. We were chosen to be His people even though we are just so insignificant. While we were still sinners, Christ died for us. While we were still sinners, He saw us through the eyes of grace and took the crown of thorns and bore those painful nails. While we were still sinners and have lost our way, sometimes not knowing that we have lost our way, He found us and picked us, made a way for us. Humans have a tendency to search deeper, and yearn for things which are beyond what we already have now. Hungry for more is good, growth is good. But we must never forget to look back into the past, for the sprouting of the seedling is always the most amazing sight. The day that the Lord took us into His family is such a precious and sacred day, a day definitely worth remembering.

Go back to this day and thank the Lord, just thank Him for the salvation that He gave, and everytime you feel like giving up, remember that the Lord has never given up on you, even though we might have done the things that He detest. Whenever you feel like giving up or when situations, things and people are just so difficult to love and embrace, remember that the Lord has never give up on us and still gave us the greatest love on earth, so that we might love others. Just be thankful that in this despair world, we have God to lean on, to be loved of and to live for. No matter how tough the circumstances, it still can never be as tough as when He paid the price of freedom, when He took a lonely cross, for us.

Thank the Lord everyday for your salvation, there is nothing better than knowing that we are redeemed. pray for this same miracle for the people around you. ")

lengshan; thankful =)

:)

oh no.. this week I am so going to die.. so so so dead.. results are coming out this week.. hopefully the sat and sun outing would lift my spirits up..gosh cannot wait!!!!!!!! :)

Dumb
Eccentric
Noob
Idiotic
Stupid
Extra

and she's so thick-skinned. but I still love her.. ><

lengshan; prepare!

disappointment in this different day.

feel so uncertain now. yeah we had fun really nice fun, playing. we had no biblical fellowship, pure laughter, ended off with me doubting. somehow it seems different, very different. dunno why though.

today you told me that you had a "different" night before that and so couldn't wake up in time for something important. gosh I was really angry at that moment, but soon it turned to disappointment. I was so disappointed, so so disappointed.. I saw no seriousness, worldly influences, no thinking before speaking, going back on your word, bringing whatever you learned outside into this precious time which I was so looking forward to. I saw kindness and love though and I dunno why this kind of love is really not what I was looking for. did I have too much expectation on you guys. I admit that you are really important to me and I would want to bring us to a deeper level in God. gosh, so far I can remember, this is the first time I felt so suffocated about us and all our this planned connectedness. probably I am like that too, but I was unable to feel God in there. somehow I just wanna run away where I can be free with God, just Him alone. I was once thankful for your and that we've had a chance to grow together in Christ. I once cried because I missed the times that we were so close and we had fun together and we grew spiritually together. now, yet, my heart feels very different. I really hope that everything I felt would be wrong. still, I would work hard in what I believe that we would grow together in Christ because you guys are just so dear to me that I pray that we would all strive hard together. =)

let the Lord take us deeper. I know He will.

lengshan; I believe in us all =)

i love our horses!

today was so exciting! I met up with ya at ps and after walking around, we've decided to go suntec because I wanted to buy the watch that I've saw the last time I went suntec. and yayyy! I bought a nice yellow watch, though different from the one that I saw the last time. but this is really nice! :) so happppyyyy!!! oh oh and I am really honoured cause ya ate auntie anne's for the first time, together with me.. haha.. oh then when we were walking to marina square ya caught sight of this shop stating $5 sale so we both went in. gosh!! the soft toys are so cheap!! only 5 bucks and the brand is nici somemore.. you can surely get one of those at 15 plus dollars but here it sells only 5 dollars! super cheap! ya bought a cute horse while I got a seahorse! super nice!!! hehe actually yes, like what ya said, horses actually meant nothing to us but because we both bought horses, so horses now meant something to us.. hehe... ><

then we went to marina square and ate hotpot culture which is really worth it since its alot and its pretty healthy I guess because they provided alot of vegetables..hahaha but this dinner was great cause we talked about so much stuff, future, family, guys and cells.. awww... every meeting with ya is always so amazing... :D and the photo we took on her phone is really awesome!! so nice and so gorgeous.. two pretty girls.. awww.. >< hehe..

lengshan; love ya.. :D

what a thought-provoking chat

God has a greater purpose for our cell
beyond merely meeting together for cell group whenever convenient
maybe its not just all about is
but maybe its about what we can do towards people around us
maybe its to inspire change, spark revival
there is more than to just meeting
there is more than to just the occasional cell where we read of cell material and teach it
this year we should be bonding
helping one another to destress by having fun
so we cannot really do anything for the church
but God doesn't always call us when we are free
its at our busiest

what we learn from cell and what we do in cell thats the key
what cell inspires us, energies us to do
having another of this, helps me gain a different perspective
not only learning about God's word but also you guys
an investment in relationship between people
furthermore its you guys

sinking into complacency
we become satisfied at bonding and meeting for cell
we gotta challenge ourselves to go higher
alot more to grow
true, in everything we need growth
but how
maybe we can encourage each other to go further in evangelism,
or find some way to help the people,
or to push each other to a higher spiritual plan

when you asked me those three questions, it really got me thinking.
I cannot remember who was the last one.
I don't know where is that place of spiritual support.
I am not sure whether we are pillars of each other.

okay initially I thought everything was fine, and I am happy with the way it works. somehow, yes, I was satisfied, contented with what we are now. But everything really needs growth. This reminds me of the example taught last year, after God filled us to the brim, we are poured into a larger vessel. again, God filled us to the brim and then poured us to an even larger vessel and the whole cycle continues again. how do we then show that we are here for God's purpose and not wasting our time, or probably God's time? we need concrete solution for growth, for strengthening of interpersonal relationships. I'm really glad that we had this chat, and I'm glad that God spoke to you about this. If we are stagnant, we will be wasting God's plan and purpose for us.

Ask, Listen, Talk about one another's spiritual walk, any day any time and any how. I believe this is just the beginning.
thanks for asking about my spiritual walk, thanks for the thoughts, thanks for talking and listening and thanks for sharing. =)
though we are busy for the world but we are never busy for God's people
we have more time than we think
no such thing as coincidence?
coincidence is God's way of being anonymous

lengshan; thanks mr h =)